‍By: The Eye Test Committee (Because Clearly the Computers are Drunk)

Let’s play a game.

Imagine a football team that plays eight home games, avoids any real road tests, schedules an FCS cupcake in November, and only ever validates its greatness by beating other teams in its own echo chamber of ego.

Congrats. You’ve just described half the SEC.

And yet, when the College Football Playoff committee releases its weekly gospel, you’d think these teams fought off Roman legions to earn that “#6 in the country with a 9-3 record” ranking. Why? Because of their legendary "Strength of Schedule" and unquestionable RPI metrics — which are about as trustworthy as a Hattiesburg gas station shrimp po’boy.

Let’s unpack the circle of lies, shall we?

🧁 Step 1: Schedule Cupcakes. Win at Home. Profit.

It starts in Week 1 when your SEC team opens against South Arkansas State Polytechnic Tech A&M — at home, of course. Then comes the rotating buffet of bottom feeder Directional Schools, the FCS Homecoming Sacrifice, and if we’re really feeling bold, maybe a neutral-site game against a Big Ten team that hasn’t been relevant since 2014.

SEC teams master the art of never leaving their zip code while still being praised for “battle-testing” themselves. Scheduling a road game at Troy or App State? Please. That’s beneath them — and also dangerous. We have seen why.

🔁 Step 2: Beat Each Other in a Circle. Call It Elite.

Here’s the beautiful part: even if they don’t play anyone outside the SEC, they beat each other!

• LSU beats Ole Miss.
• Ole Miss beats Texas A&M.
• A&M beats LSU.

...and somehow, they all move up in the rankings.

This is what experts call circular validation — where the only proof you need of greatness is that your cousin says you’re smart, and you say your cousin is smart. And the CFP committee? They’re sitting at Thanksgiving dinner nodding along.

📊 Step 3: Let the Flawed Metrics Do the Dirty Work

RPI, a metric invented for basketball, is dragged into football like a toddler forced into a tuxedo — it doesn’t fit, doesn’t make sense, and nobody looks good.

It’s based on:

• Your record
• Your opponents' record
• And your opponents' opponents' record

…which means if everyone in your bubble keeps winning at home against cupcakes and trading wins, your RPI will look amazing — even if you never beat a top-25 team on the road or tested yourself against another Power Four league.

Meanwhile, a Group of Five team could go 11–1, with road wins, and a Power Four scalp — and still sit behind a 3-loss SEC team that beat Vanderbilt by 10.

🛑 Step 4: Avoid Accountability

Want to test the theory? Ask why the Alabamas and Georgias of the world never schedule home-and-homes with teams like Boise State, Tulane, or Louisiana. Simple:

They might actually lose.

And if they lose one of those (which they have done courtesy of Sun Belt teams more often the last few seasons), the whole RPI empire falls like a card table at a tailgate. Better to just pretend those teams don’t exist and lean on the “SEC gauntlet” narrative — a gauntlet that somehow includes South Carolina and Mississippi State every year.

📺 Step 5: Let ESPN Tell the Story

Don't worry — if any of this seems fishy, you won’t hear about it on national broadcasts. The SEC Network (owned by ESPN, the same entity pumping playoff narratives) will tell you how incredible Kentucky’s 8-4 season was, even if they played two FCS schools and were outgained by 200 yards in half their wins.

Final Thought: It's Not That the SEC is Bad. It's That the System is Rigged.

The top of the SEC? Elite.

But let’s not kid ourselves — the bottom half wouldn’t survive in the former Pac-12, and the metrics used to elevate the middle are made of duct tape and self-hype.

So next time someone tells you Team X from the SEC has a “top-10 strength of schedule,” just smile and ask them how many road games they played outside the conference.

You’ll either get a long pause or a pivot to “but we beat each other up in this league.”

Exactly. That’s the problem.